BREAK IN MY CAR

Hello.

Let's make this short and simple.

-=thoughts running through=-

1. my pet society is effing slow and im so sick of it.

2. im so hungry and i love to eat but im so fat.

3. im so tired after work and i thirst for a full body aromatic massage.

4. i hate my job because i make more than 100 calls a day.

5. but i feel productive having something to do.

6. my colleague studies in Help too.

7. so long since i last go out and had fun.

8. my laptop got stolen by some assholes im sure he's not educated enough. (elaborate later)

9. planning on a new laptop but im so lazy to research.

10.my gossip girl series was in my stolen laptop, so are a lot of my sister's business ideas and our pictures.

11.i just done one of my event job in beauty fair and getting money soon but im poor for now.

12.i effing HATE the rollover advertisement at the side bar of any website especially facebook. u advertisers just make us hate ur product more.

13.i am tired.



Sometimes short sentence tells how i feel the whole week.

ELABORATION OF NUMBER 8 :

It was a beautiful day , i was accompanying my boy friend in a cyber cafe, i then went out to find my friend. oh that was one day before my event job started. so what happened was i was urging my bf to bring me to taman megah pasar malam because i wanna get myself a pair of black socks for my job (also helping my friend to buy) so i was very enlightened to shop at pasar malam cause that was the chance i got after a year. so, expected there to be no parking, i asked my bf to park somewhere further instead, cause i dun mind to walk ! then we got down the car, u know girls, wont just shop for one thing, so we went on to talk for a while... and i swear, not even half an hour later we went back to take our car.

some guys were staring at our car, my first respond was... are they gonna break our glasses? then i walked faster...

" ur car got broken in "

holy shit what the fuck muthaf*ka c*ba* all kinda swear and rudest words came out my mind but i only managed to say oh my god.

the guy looking at my bf's car was a random guy parking next to us, his car is an estima and his got broken too.

oh ya, forgot to tell u, first thing came to my mind when i know the car got broken in was... my laptop. my laptop was one month old, how NEW !!! and i am just so so so so so fucking pissed at those uneducated fellas ! i mean, u want something, work for it, not STEALING ! oh thats not even stealing, thats BURGLARY. fuck them all seriously.

if u are so rich to buy a laptop detector, go buy yourself a cup to sit beside the road side maybe i would donate few cents to you. by breaking into my bf's car, stealing my new laptop, leaving all the shattered glasses all over the car dont make you someone smart and rich ! but it makes others poor, sad, and troublesome to clean off the shattered glasses.

i wont say its not my fault of leaving my laptop in the car without supervision but hello, does it mean u can BREAK my glasses and steal ? fuck you ok.
before breaking ppl's glasses and stealing ppl's things, please spend half a second to think, what if that happens to you? oups sorry forgot that u have no brain or ur brain is so full of shits.

BE CIVILISED

or these people never grew up to realise that they have left the stone age long time ago ? no wonder, no wonder, no wonder Malaysia has such a high rate of criminal records... tsk tsk. thanks these people. why not u guys get out of malaysia and go to somewhere like mars or venus where there is no human? so u dont need to live so competitive that u need so much money to steal my laptop.

come on people, 2009 already. who doesnt know the economy is down? who doesnt know crisis is coming? not just you okay. well. i cant say nothing but please please, don't take others' burden as your happiness. go nowhere but hell.

Broken Strings

Let me hold you
For the last time
It's the last chance to feel again
But you broke me
Now I can't feel anything

When I love you,
It's so untrue
I can't even convince myself
When I'm speaking,
It's the voice of someone else

Oh it tears me up
I try to hold on, but it hurts too much
I try to forgive, but it's not enough to make it all okay

You can't play on broken strings
You can't feel anything that your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real

Oh the truth hurts
And lies worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before

Oh what are we doing
We are turning into dust
Playing house in the ruins of us

Running back through the fire
When there's nothing left to save
It's like chasing the very last train when it's too late

Broken Strings, by James Morrison.

First day, i woke up at 2 something, pm. then i online listening to songs and do some house chores then hang out with my sisters and played with my puppy. times flies and it comes to 7pm now. the night is scary and lonely. but i did not tear a single drop today, i rate myself 90%.

im sitting by the balcony, natural wind, but very hazy out there, guess it's time to get on a mask. keeping myself occupied, is not the best way to get out of all these, i know. but at least, im not crying like a baby. my body is all tired out, so is my soul and mental. but surprisingly, my emotion is pretty stable.

but, still, i wonder how is he doing. im sure he's not in a good mood too, but all the best, let's pray for him. pray that he will feel much better than me. pray that he'll have all his best.

as for myself, i'll continue doing this, moving on. life's not all about love, true? keeping it to myself and my blog is the only thing i will do now cause i find no point sharing, turning to anyone but my own.

what difference does this make to my life? drastic. maybe it changed my life the other way round, but who knows, it might be good? but im still hurt. i still wanna see him, still wanna be around him, still wanna make him laugh.

im sure i do better.

My Immortal

this wound wont seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase
u cry I'd wipe away all of your tears
u scream I'd fight away all of your fears
i hold your hand through all of these years
you still have... all of me.
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
but though you're still with me
I've been alone all along...

I used to listening to this song the last time i broke up. No difference to this time, i'm still listening to it.

one difference i spot, this time, it's much more painful than any others. feels sad yet weird, im not crying now, on the first night. dont know if im already immuned or im too tired to cry. or maybe i still haven't face it properly.

i am back to single again!

and i cant fall asleep no matter how tired my body and soul are. no matter how tiring my eyes are, i just cant seem to close them. im scared of the images popping up my mind.

is this for good. is this for real. is this true.

wake up lil hunny, yes it is. pull your eyes open and see the truth.

never knew the pain is so untouchable, so fake... im diving in the fantasy... dun seem to want to wake up. this dream is over hunny, so wake up. move on move on. someone tells me these? tomorrow is a better day. but how bout tonight? THINK OF TOMORROW!

but how good tomorrow is ?

If your internet line sux... u probably gonna wait really long for pics. lol

HAPPY HOLIDAYS

if your holiday is still on! just like mine...

Holidays r fun in a way that... you're always available for any outing and u are always so free to do whatever thing you like.

As for me, i had a boring week, last week i mean. and i finally feel so occupied this week ! until today... im able to slow down my path, sitting relaxed, blog as usual.

What did i do this week? I had interviews, friend's farewell party, shopping(a fruitful one!), karaoke, well, basically im always outside when the sun shines! lol.

alright, so finally i hv pics! actually i've transferred days ago but as said, i was busy this week so now only i could upload them!

Deeviah's Farewell Party @ Telawi Street Bistro, Bangsar

the size is not properly edit as im too lazy

patheticcc

im sure u would love to know how a student on 3 months holiday would spend her time.

everytime before my holidays come, i'll have a whole long list of plans, to-dos so that i wont be a redundant someone, sleeping at home 24/7 complaining bored and feel like a retard. Sadly, none of my plan comes true, everytime! and yes, not as expected, im the one who complains BORED TO DEATH now. And, i also wonder when is my new sem starting !!! cant wait for it !!!

i hate waking up early, i hate scratching my heads over tough subjects, i hate burning midnight oil studying for tests, i hate travelling all the way to my college for classes, i hate preparing for exams, i dunno why i feel completely different now. i wish i can go classes again, studying for subjects, researching for assignments and stuffs! oh, pathetic!!!

u know, i feel so ... (lemme find a right word to explain my feeling) *after 5 mins* gosh, i really dunno how to explain how i feel ~ i just, dont wanna stuck in pet society for the entire day, googling over thousands of stuffs, chasing after bizarre gossips, do everything to try to make myself feel useful. im like, wasting my life... seeing my life fading slowly away! not exaggerating. im sure no one likes to feel useless, had nothing done in a whole 24hours, lay your palm to your mom to get money! tsk tsk. this is what i am. sad huh!!!